The F-Word

The more I spend time on social media, the sadder I become. More and more Facebook and other social media sites have become forums for people to post articles, kind of like this one, and more often than not those articles are trying to be "progressive", "politically correct", or damaging to tradition. Each time I read one of these articles I feel as if my morals and beliefs are being challenged or pushed aside as being "old-fashioned" or even wrong. The biggest problem I have with these articles is that they aren't discussions. People write their opinions and expect other people to read and agree with them and then other people, like me, have to write rebuttles and hope somebody reads them. It's not very efficient.

Anyway, that's how it is I guess and so I just wanted to voice some of my opinions on an issue close to home. (Sorry if I jump around. Just try to stay with me) Recently, there has been a lot of hype over Feminism and it's mostly to do with female sexuality. I have read numerous articles telling women that we need to take control of our bodies and our sexuality, and, by golly, if we don't want to have kids we don't have to! Some of these articles include: "I'm Fighitng BYU's Ban on Sex", Your Messed Up Christian Tradition is Fetishizing Little Girls, and Zooey Deschanel Doesn't Want Kids. Of course these are only a few of the articles, but these are the ones I remember right now. Here's the problem:

The people who write these things are unabashadly telling us that traditional roles of women are bad. Why have kids when you can have a career and take care of yourself? Anyone telling you to save yourself for marriage is a jerk and trying to control you! SEX! SEX! SEX! And, actually, these are all fine opinions to have. Women are sexual and some women want to sleep around and not worry about having kids. That's your choice. But what about those women who don't agree? Who are being told that your dad is a creep because he asks you to remain pure until your wedding day? Why is it ok to tell us that being Christian is "messed up"? Or having the university that you love challenged for having rules that make you feel safe and secure in your beliefs? (Which is the whole reason you went to that university in the first place) Women are allowed to want to be virgins!

There I said it. The world keeps talking about freeing yourself sexually by experimenting and getting it on with whoever, whenever... But guess what? Not having sex is very freeing. I was a virgin until I got married and I loved it. No seriously, I often thought about how much control being a virgin gave me over my own body. You want to be free from men? Don't let them touch you! At all! HA! When you're a virgin you're FREED from wondering if the guy just wants you for the sex, you're free from wondering if you're going to miss your next period (teen pregnancy? Nah!), you never have to give all of yourself to someone and then watch them go off with someone else the next night. I could go on. My point is, if 95% of the population is having sex outside of marriage, then who are these people preaching to? That other 5% is obviously making a conscious choice to not do those things and we don't need those people shoving their opinions on sex and marriage down our throats. You do you, I'll do my husband. (too much?)

Why are we constantly told that the modern woman should stay single, have a career, and use men for casual sex? Why is the traditional role of women (And the Christian role) - being a married, stay-at-home mom - constantly challenged? Maybe I like being married to someone that has promised to love me no matter what, coming home and having that person there. Maybe I really love that I never had sex with anyone else because that makes me feel like sex means something more than just pleasure. Maybe I want to have babies and lots of them! (Maybe not 10...) Maybe because that is what we, as women, were made to do. That may have been too many "maybe's" but, all I'm asking is to not tell me I'm wrong because I'm Christian and have Christian values. No one is forcing you to be anything you don't want to be, so please stop trying to tell us that we can't be what we choose to be. Right now Feminism means being equal to men - having the same pay, same jobs, same sexual rights, etc. Perhaps if we were real feminists we would be a little more proud to be WOMEN. To do what women are made to do and to not forget that we have the inherent ability be soft, compassionate, motherly, virtuous, and strong all at the same time. Maybe then feminism wouldn't be associated with angry, hairy man-haters. Women can do anything they set their mind to, but they can still be women.

P.S. There is no problem with the fact that Zooey Deschanel doesn't want kids. I simply used that article as an example of the glamorization of being kid-free.